Forgotten Secrets
“Good morning Phil.” I mutter as I mount the steps onto the bus.
“Morning Alex.” He replies with a smile. There’s no empathy in his deep voice. Nothing different in his dark brown eyes, slouched posture, or wide toothy smile. Just the usual Phil.
He doesn’t know.
Good. I don’t want him to know. I don’t want anyone to know. Maybe no one watched the news last night. Maybe no one found out. It’s a long shot, but a girl has got to have a little bit of hope.
That hope dies when I turn to find a seat. Everyone is staring at me, eyes screaming pity. Everyone, but one. Jennifer.
She never believes rumours so people have stopped telling her. She never watches the news claiming it’s too depressing. She can’t possibly know.
And she doesn’t. “Hey Al.” She smiles. She knows I hate it when she calls me that. But right now I like it. It’s normal, and at the moment normal is what I need most.
“Hi Jenn.”
“Alex?” I spin around in my seat to find Violet staring at me with her sad, deep blue eyes, blonde curls blowing in the wind as the bus starts moving. “Alex?” She tries again, sympathy practically dripping from her tongue.
I fake a sigh. “Not now Violet. I’ll help you with your math later.”
“T-that’s not what I was going to say.” I can tell she’s confused as she tries to spit her out words. “I was going to say–”
I tilt my head a little and glare at her. A warning. “–I’m not finished my chemistry homework yet, so I can’t help you with that either. I’ll help you at lunch.” She looks startled, but she gets the message.
“Alex!” Jenn is clearly upset about the way I treated our friend. “I’ll help you Vi. What are you guys doing in math and chemistry?”
“N-never mind. I’ll ask Casey. Thanks though.”
Jenn smiles, “Of course Vi, anytime.” She turns around and I instantly know I’m in for a pep talk. “What’s wrong with you today Alex? You’re acting all weird.” When I don’t answer she continues. “Alex common, you and I both know that something’s going on here. Alex please, I’m your best friend. You can trust me.”
She’s right, I can trust her, I just don’t want to see the sadness in my best friend’s eye’s telling me that she’s so sorry to hear that, asking me what she can do to help. I just can’t take that.
I take a deep breath and hold it, on the verge of tears. “I know.” is all I manage to rip out of throat. She waits for more. Waits for me to continue talking and explain what happened. I don’t.
She sighs, “Ok, tell me whenever you’re ready to.” I let out the air I held trapped in my chest, relieved. She’ll find out eventually, but she doesn’t need to know right this second. She tries to spark a conversation about my training last night, asking how it went and what we did, but I’m too stuck in my own head to respond.
It’s a weird feeling. I have so many people around me. My friends, strangers, and people I avoid for good reason. Yet, even with all of us crammed onto this bus, I feel alone.
I feel so alone.
  • Unlock this sticker:

    Redeem Crowns


    There was an error redeeming your Crowns.

    Only upgraded members can redeem Crowns for these stickers.

    Unlock Stickers

    Earn 20 more Crowns to unlock this sticker. Or, upgrade to get it right now.

    Unlock Stickers

    Crowns FAQ

Add your comment

Sign into Storybird to post a comment.

Create an account

Create an account to get started. It’s free!

Sign up

or sign in with email below